Wednesday, March 27, 2013

Why I Am Celebrating Today

Ladies and Gentlemen, my boyfriend, Leonard Cohen.

  I am about to go to a Ticketmaster location near me and pick up my Leonard Cohen tickets! His concert was the best concert of my life, so we are making the trek to Louisville Kentucky this weekend to go see him again! I am very excited. This time I might even buy a t-shirt! I mean, it will be the most cherished t-shirt in the history of ever and last time I did not buy one. I still kick myself at my own cheapskate ways on that night. Indulging should be over very special things, right? So send me your congratulations, send me your applause, send me Paypal... I am going to see Leonard Cohen!

     We are going to be staying right at the 4th street area, so if you have downtown Louisville dining tips throw them at me.

Tuesday, March 26, 2013

Five Things You Should Never Say To Your Mother

Five things you should never say to your mother: (especially if your mother is me)

1. "What's for dinner?
      Reason: Self explanatory.  (And under penalty of death) 
     Substitute Instead: "Can I make dinner?"

2. Anything starting with the words "Did you buy me that... already?"
    Reason: If I already had it I would have given it to you.
    Substitute Instead:  "I would like to remind you..."

3. Things starting with  "Where is my.... ?" or "Have you seen my...?"
    Reason: I am not your mother. (Okay, I am, but still.)
    Substitute: Look with your eyes, not your mouth.

4. "No, (implied sorry,) we did not make any for you." 
     Reason: If you are cooking for yourself in my kitchen with my food you should offer me some.
     Substitute: "Mom, we are making some eggs and sausage. Should we include you?"

5. "I did not buy you a ticket to the Leonard Cohen concert I am attending."
    Reason: You might not make it out alive.
    Substitute: "Pack your polka dotted shirt, Mom! I am taking you to see Leonard Cohen!"

Mama’s Losin’ It

Thursday, March 21, 2013

Ten Things I Do Not Know How To Do

     I am always trying to learn new things. I feel like there are so many interesting things in the world I have never even heard of yet that I'll never get to knows all the cool stuff. This fact bothers me a little bit, if I am being honest. Like today, for example. TED talks are happening in Cleveland. But when did I learn about it? Today! And when did the tickets sell out? 21 minutes after they went on sale, on a day long before today.

     There are lots of things I have done/can do which surprise people. But there is plenty I do not know how to do.  For example:

1. I do not know how to speak Spanish. Even though I have lived in Texas, California, and Venezuela, I'm pretty much an English-only kind of girl. It's embarrassing. I mistake more words than I get right, which is even more embarrassing. "Why are you calling that a 'kitchen'?" I ask my husband. "It means pig" he replies. 

2. I do not know how to write a resume. You would think this shouldn't matter to me. I am not employed. But maybe some days I wish I was. Or maybe I wish I could be if I wanted to be. 

3. I do not know how to drive a stick shift. I've driven tractors. Does that count at all?

4. I do not know how to shut up. Seriously. I tell myself I will. Then I don't. Ever.

5. I do not know how to ask for what I want without feeling guilty. From trivial things like "Would you fill up my water bottle for me when you go downstairs?" to "Could we go see Leonard Cohen in concert?" I feel guilty as hell if I ask. 

6.  I don't know how to grow old gracefully. When I notice things I used to without thinking about them are now physically straining or overwhelming for me I sort of lose my mind.

7. I don't know how to parent my 'grown' children. They still seem so vulnerable to me. I really want to make them take naps and then later we will make cookies and watch Joe Scruggs videos and go to Chuck E Cheese. 

8. I don't know how to be a better person. I promise myself I will have more internal patience. I will change my inner dialogue. But then the same things that bugged me all my life happen and (surprise!) they still bug me. My inner dialogue doesn't change. I still feel guilty about it. 

9. I don't know how to make myself finish things.

Mama’s Losin’ It

Wednesday, March 20, 2013

Stuff My Daughter Shares

One of my kids likes to take to Twitter with the things I say and do. Here are some of her tweets which are either quotes (of things I mostly do not remember saying) or observances. 

Gummy Bears are my homeboys

Upon leaving my great grandma's house "oh... People are starting to look a little bit old." She turned 87 today.

Synergy is the YOLO of the business world.

"Wait I just need to drink the rest of these Pringles" 

Me: "I just lied to somebody." 
Mom: "good job Allie."

Mom watching :What I like is they can really teach U howto be a f*ing lady    

"I almost came to the table without pants on. But then I remembered, we're eating dinner, not breakfast."

When you ask my mom for something she doesn't want to give/do, she'll say "What. I'm not your mom!" oh the absence of perks in adulthood..

Two weeks to get a car. Negative Nancy says this won't be easy.  (Pretty sure this was about me, too. Though I have no proof and did not ask)

I'm shameless, in that my actions do not require or result in shame. 

Xmas was a success  witnessed my mom turn into  as she exclaimed "YOU get a bedroom! &YOU get a bedroom &YOU &YOU!" 

my mom left the kitchen, i followed her very closely asking 'does it bug you when people always follow you around the house like this? 

My mother is a both a comedian and a genius She has me cracking up all the day.  

I'll end on a high note! 

Monday, March 18, 2013

Dear Kid (At Whatever Age)

     I'm talking to you, the one with the difficult life. You, the kid, who can not understand why the other kids on the school bus are so happy about weekends, and summer break. Because I know you dread weekends, and you have no words to explain how you feel about the horror that is summer break. In those weekends and breaks there pass too many hours where you have no reprieve, nobody to save you. Whatever happens in those hours - the yelling, hitting, other unspeakable things is always unpredictable. There's not a thing you can do to make it okay. No matter how good you try to be you will never be good enough to make it stop.

     I know you play in your closet a lot because it makes you feel safer. Something about being unseen brings you great comfort. I have heard you wish there was a closet inside your closet. I have heard you wish you could die. I know your nightmares are not limited to sleeping hours. I know they dance around in your head all the time. You're always scared, even when things are 'okay' because you know how precarious 'okay' is. You never know who you can trust. You especially never know 'for how long'. 

    I know you watch people, and try to interact in ways which let them know you like them, without ever really belonging. Because belonging, as you know, is not so great. I know you love those people who you do not trust. You love them very much. And then sometimes you wish they would die. Because you hate them, too. I've heard you vow to never, ever, ever let those people see you cry. Sometimes you can't help it and it makes you mad at yourself. Then you make that vow again, with even more resolve. 

    Maybe you don't think about yourself alone. Maybe you think about siblings. I know this makes it even more difficult. You can't decide whether you would rather protect them at your own peril, which you know is futile anyway, or stay as far away as possible. I know you don't trust anyone. I do not blame you. But I still want you to know something. 

     One day, if you create your life carefully,  this will all feel like someone else's life you read about in a book. You'll empathize, sympathize, and maybe shed a tear for the characters, but you will be able to be out of that story. So now you have to do the thing other people were not able to do for you. You have to make good choices. You have to behave as if you deserve only the best people in your life. You have to treat yourself as if you are precious and your own well being is the most important thing there is. Because it is. You have to cling to whatever good you can and fight away the rest with those swords of resolve you have created. You can do it, because if life has given you one gift, it is resolve wrapped around strength. Exercise it in every situation. Wield it like a deadly weapon. 

     I am on your side. And even though it doesn't feel like it, so is most of the world. Right now, while you are in the middle of chaos, I tell you it is possible for you to do this. Please, believe me. Please know there are others who made it. You can make it, too. 

Here's another person who made it through. She realizes how the story moves away from front and center of your heart, to a more long-term storage. Read what she says here.

     *If you or someone you know is suffering abuse there are many places to turn. Here is a list of a few: 

Mama’s Losin’ It

Friday, March 15, 2013

Bob's Hamburg, Akron Ohio

Bob's Hamburg, counter seat. Right in the middle of the action!

     The other day I had to make a run to Akron, which I never enjoy. I am a country mouse, not a city rat. I am also not sure I should be mentioning mice and rats when I am about to tell you about an eatery, but such if life. Since I was in Akron with our youngest child I thought I would pull up Urbanspoon on my phone and see what was close. Bob's Hamburg was 1.7 miles away! 

     Bob's Hamburg is an Akron legend. They have been around now for over eighty years - that's a long time for a family owned diner to stay in business. I think they have six booths and a counter to seat another six or so. It's tiny. See the photo above? We sat at the counter so we could be right where the action is. The grill is small, I think about 2 feet by 4 feet. The place was packed when we arrived, right at the end of breakfast service. When they switched over to lunch I contemplated staying and eating it too, but the breakfast was so giant I had to take half of it home already. 

     Did I mention the food? It's sublime! I have had their hamburgers and they are special. The fries and onion rings are the real thing. The omelet I had I think was three large (burger sized) sausage patties fried and cut up into what I think was three eggs and cheese. And of course, I had to order some of their amazing hash browns. They are some of my favorite hash browns ever. And a cup of gravy, which had the equivalent of another sausage patty in it. If you are in Akron, go check them out. 

     Bob's Hamburg is doing fish fry Fridays right now for lent and they are staying open until 8:00PM. Lake Erie perch, people! Plus oysters and crab cakes. Call (330)253-02627  for carry out or go save me a seat at 1351 East Avenue in Akron. The cook the orders in the order they come in, so you may get anxious thinking it is taking longer than you expected, but that's because of phone in orders. They will not forget you and it will be worth the wait. 

*UrbanSpoon has them listed as cash only, but I was able to use my Discover. Maybe they used to be cash only, but now they definitely take cards. 

Bob's Hamburg on Urbanspoon

Thursday, March 14, 2013

Bombay Company Is Back!


     Back in 2007 I won this contest on Fuel My Blog and the prize was $200. I used the prize to buy tables to flank our bed from Bombay Company. I love them as much today as I did the day I bought them. Not long after that, Bombay Company closed their stores in the U.S. and kind of disappeared from my radar. But they are back and as great as ever. They have a facebook presence now. I'm going to begin working with them on Pinterest soon. Here is a link to Bombay Company's U.S. Pinterest account.  Also, here they are on twitter

     I do not want to buy all my furniture from the big box stores made out of flakeboard. I like my furniture to have curves, like me. Maybe interesting, chunky legs, like me. I also appreciate the hardware when I buy something like this. My bedside tables both have a top drawer which locks, and a decorative keyhole on the bottom drawer.  The drawer fronts are rounded. 

     While I was on facebook today I saw they are going to start selling rugs. If their rugs are as nice as their other things, I would say we are in luck! Who needs a rug or ten for their new house? I know I do! 

Friday, March 8, 2013

I Don't Know Why

     I don't know why this tickled me so much, but it did. Maybe you will think it's pretty funny, too!

Wednesday, March 6, 2013



     Pizza. The newest word we have to spell in front of our dogs. Because the other day we mentioned Pizza to each other and the hounds got so stirred up we could not get them calm again. So we had to send out for pizza. Of course. Because you tell me: Who amongst us is not entirely at the mercy of the whims of their pets? 

     We already had to spell the obvious words: Park!, walk, outside, bacon. We get it. They get excited when they hear certain words and it's really not fair to talk about walks outside in the park with bacon when one isn't prepared to head out the door. But pizza? This came as an endearing surprise. And now it if I want pizza I guess all I have to do is casually mention it in front of the doggage. Go ahead, people who knew the old me. The "I would never have an animal in my house" me. The me of a few years ago. Laugh at how things have changed. You will not be laughing alone, I assure you. Also, you're ALL getting puppies for Christmas! *Not an actual puppies-on-the-way announcement, just an empty threat.

Sunday, March 3, 2013

PinPuff for Pinterest.

Hello. Are you a Pinterest lover? So many people, and especially those of us who live in a house, have children, wear clothing, like to travel, or eat food really enjoy Pinterest! My very own Pinterest account is chalk full of things I would like to buy, do to the house, and eat. 

If you always feel the need to see where you stand there are some helpful tools for Pinterest. I like PinPuff, because it always seems to work. Some of the other sites  are always stuck or giving me an error page. But good old reliable Pinpuff is always willing to tell me where I stand. Using it today I found I have nearly 10,000 repins of my pins. I thought that was pretty neat!