It has been one month plus one day. It feels fresh every day. It feels like forever. It hurts and it doesn't seem to be getting 'better'. Sure, there are moments when I think about the wonderful things and they fill me with warmth and even laughter. The problem is even the warmth turns cold and when the laughter fades away the blinding, stinging pain is still right there with me. I do not know what to do.
Now two days because I sat staring at this last night, but did not post it. I am slowly giving up on wishing for this to all be a dream because I have never had a dream last this long before. But if I could wake up and find this was a terrible dream of some kind, I would be thrilled.