Tuesday, March 13, 2007

Tall Tuesday Tale... sort of

The following is a copy of a lunatic letter I sent to the people at Pentel in a desperate attempt to get refills for my favorite pen. Do they care about their (scarily) loyal customers? I think not.

They have not even bothered to send a canned reply. Uncaring group, they are!


Dear Pentel-People,

The one, the only pen I've ever used that was perfectly comfortable, perfectly fluid, always reliable, beautiful, and trustworthy has run out of ink.

This pen is like an appendage to me, I fell in Love with it, and, like a true girl in Love, I have eyes for no other. I can not be swayed.

This pen is the Pentel B460. It's a stainless steel click pen with a black rubber grip that's not too big, not too straight, not too soft, not too hard.Like that one bowl of porridge dear, sweet Goldilocks finally ate, it's just right. It's righter (sic) than rain. It's the bed Goldilocks could finally fall asleep in.

I'll admit I've tried. I've tried writing with other pens. My husband bought me two pens from Tiffany & Co. Those pens are pretty, and people gush over them, but they're all fluff and no substance. In my mind, my heart, my hand - there's only one pen for me. My B460 is best friend material. (I mean, "The Courtship of Eddie's Father" - People let me tell you 'bout my best friend - type of material- Gee, I hope whoever reads this is old enough to remember that show, but I'm probably going to seem totally insane anyway, so it's of minimal importance.)

Please! I need these refills or bears might eat me!

Now, I might sound a little melodramatic to you, but I've searched for years, in several countries, in several languages for these refills, all to no avail. Between you and me, I think there is a world-wide conspiracy to keep me from my beloved refills. If I don't get them, three bears might eat me! Goldilocks - she had a happy ending. What about me, Pentel-People? Can you help me have a happy ending? I don't want to waste your time with just a silly little refill - I'll buy 10 - I'll buy 20! I want to write with this pen for the rest of my life!

I need refills for this pen. I've become like a crack-addict and the Pentel KFLT8 refill is my drug.

Now, to you Powers That Be at Pentel, this request may seem silly. To people who know me, this request may seem silly. But to anyone, anywhere, who's ever had a favorite thing that couldn't possibly be replaced, this request makes perfect sense.

I'm a pen-nobody. They will never write about me in "Penmanship Monthly" or "Cosmo Pen". I can't influence millions, or even thousands, or even hundreds to use any certain pen. I might have influence over tens of people - I can be crafty that way. But, even though I'm just a wife, mom of 5, and seemingly insane woman who's almost 40, for heaven's sake, ranting about a pen in an email to a bunch of people who grace the cover of "Pen" every month, I hope my gratitude alone will make it worth your while to help me find refills for my trusty Pentel B460.

Please, can you help me?

Pretty Please?

Pretty Please with sugar on top?

Sincerely,

My Name
xxxx My Rd.
My City, XX xxxxx-xxxx

(xxx)xxx-xxxx
(xxx)xxx-xxxx <--- my super-duper top secret cell phone number!

4 comments:

  1. I work at Cult Pens, a pen shop in the UK, and we should be able to get hold of them. Unfortunately, the postage to the US would make it an expensive way of getting refills. If you can't find any over there, though, let me know (just mail us at sales@cultpens.com), and we'll find out if Pentel UK have them and how much they cost.

    ReplyDelete
  2. ^^^^^ HEY!! Looks like you so have a hook up. Cult pens? I can't believe you don't already know abou them. I also can not believe Pentel has not responded by sending you one of every pen they sell. Jerks.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I'll Have some as well if you can get them. I have mont blancs and caran D'ashe but this humble B460 is my favorite

    ReplyDelete
  4. Les, I found refills!! Although they are not made by Pentel, they fit perfectly and work just fine. They are readily available and inexpensive as well! If only I had a way to contact you, I'd send you an email.

    ReplyDelete